Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney
The First Turnabout
Phoenix Wright
- (referring to his friend Larry) Our school had a saying: "When something smells, it's usually the Butz."
- The autopsy notes the time of death at sometime after 4PM. There was nobody to... er... no "body" to find at 1:00 PM!
- Proof enough for you, Mr. Sahwit? Or should I say... Mr. Did It!
Mia Fey
- Lies always beget more lies! See through one, and their whole story falls apart!
- This is no laughing matter! You did pass the bar didn't you?
- I think I feel a migraine coming on...
- Try thinking out of the box! Don't waste time doubting the facts. Assume the clock was three hours slow and... Think through it! Ask yourself, "Why was the clock three hours slow"? Figure out the reason, and you'll have your proof!
- Wright? I hope you see the importance of evidence now. Also, hopefully you realize, things change depending on how you look at them. People, too. We never really know if our clients are guilty or innocent. All we can do is believe in them. And in order to believe in them, you have to believe in yourself.
Other
- Butz: I wasn't dumped! She just wasn't taking my phone calls. Or seeing me... Ever.
- Judge: If you wish to hang yourself, Mr. Wright, you're welcome to, but not inside my courtroom.
Dialogue
- Butz: We were great together! We were Romeo and Juliet, Cleopatra and Mark Anthony!
- Phoenix: (Um... didn't they all die?)
- Judge: Ahem. Mr Wright? This is your first trial, is it not?
- Phoenix: Y-Yes, Your Honor. I'm, um, a little nervous.
- Judge: Your conduct during this trial will determine the fate of your client. Murder is a serious charge. For your client's sake, I hope you can control your nerves.
- Phoenix: Thank... thank you, Your Honor.
- Judge: Mr Wright, given the circumstances... I think we should have a test to ascertain your readiness.
- Phoenix: Yes, Your Honor. (Gulp... Hands shaking... Eyesight... fading...)
Turnabout Sisters
Phoenix Wright
- Why did I become a lawyer in the first place...? Because someone has to look out for the people who have no one on their side.
- (My heart goes out to you, Edgeworth. Not.)
Miles Edgeworth
- I object! That was... objectionable!
- The guilty will always lie, to avoid being found out. There's no way to tell who is guilty and who is innocent! All that I can hope to do is get every defendant declared "guilty"! So I make that my policy.
Redd White
- Welcome! Please furnish me with the title of your personage! …Your name! What's your name? I was just inquirably asking the title that you go by.
- What's wrong? Is something stuck to my face? Why yes! There's my eyes, and my nose, and my mouth…
ther
- Dick Gumshoe: [when asked about blood tests] Huh? What kind? Umm... well... I hear they take the, um, little bits in the blood, the... er... hemo... hemogl... Hermo... goblins... hobgob... Er...? Herma-goblin bobbin... I-I refuse to testify on this matter, sir! I'm no expert on blood tests!
- Judge: [to April May] The witness will refrain from wonton winking!
- April: What's it to you, porcupine-head!?
- April: I like a man with a big... vocabulary.
- April: You... you LAWYER!
Dialogue
- April: ... So? What is it you wish to ask of me, then? Hmm?
- Phoenix: (For starters, how did you get to be so totally whacked!?)
- Bellboy: He struck me as a real "Lady Killer," if you'll pardon the expression. I knew it from the moment I saw him, sir. He and I are of the same ilk. We both carry the scent of... danger.
- Phoenix: (There we are in total agreement, Mr. Psycho Bellboy.)
- April: You don't just have spiky hair, you also have a spiky heart.
- Phoenix: (That does it. When this case is done I'm shaving my head.)
- April: (When presenting incorrect evidence) Hey guess what? Actually, I really hate your guts. So get lost because, well I'm not co-operating.
- Phoenix: (Thanks, I noticed...)
- Edgeworth: Please state your full name.
- White: You wish to know the title of my personage?
- Edgeworth: Er... your name?
- White: Yes! That is what I said! Oh dear, do my locutions confuse?
- Edgeworth: Name!
- Phoenix: (These two are great together...)
Turnabout Samurai
Phoenix Wright
- It must be nice to live so free of guilt.
- Ohhh yeah, right here! Sherlock Holmes II, baby!
Maya
- Old windbag sure has balls! Or... well, you know what I mean.
- Um, maybe I shouldn't be saying this... But he definitely did it. Murder. At least once. Maybe twice.
Dialogue
- Manella: Yeah... sux0rz! I hate missing out on food...
- Maya: Nick... what does "Sucksores" mean?
- Phoenix: No idea...
- Maya: Hey, Nick... It's Ms. Vasquez! Hello?
- Vasquez: ...
- Maya: H-E-L-L-O!
- Vasquez: ...
- Maya: H! E! L! L! O!
- Maya: The old windbag sure is quiet today.
- Oldbag: ...
- Maya:Hey I bet we could even eat the donuts in the guard station!
- Oldbag: ... You eat, you die.
- Maya: Whew! She's alive.
- Edgeworth: Will the witness declare her name?
- Oldbag: ...Hmm? My, aren't you a handsome fellow! I'm afraid I'm a bit flustered!
- Edgeworth: Y-your name, please!
- Oldbag: Oh, dearie! No need for you to be embarrassed! Just call me "grandma."
- Edgeworth: YOUR NAME, PLEASE!
- Phoenix: (Seems Edgeworth has a bit of trouble getting his witnesses to say their names...)
- Oldbag: You let 'em have it, Edgey-boy!
- Phoenix: (E-Edgey-boy...?)
- Edgeworth: ...
Other
- Manella: (After presenting any evidence other than Powers's(?) Photo) I try not to pay much attention to things that don't interest me. LOL.
- Maya: W-why are you staring at me like that...?
- Oldbag: Umm... E-Edgey-boy! Help!
Turnabout Goodbyes
Miles Edgeworth
- [After Phoenix asks to defend him] ... I hoped you wouldn't come. I didn't want you to see me. Not like this.
Dialogue
- Maya: The water pressure's kind of low in that shower.
- Phoenix: You want more pressure, huh? Why don't you go down to the fire department and have them spray you with the hose?
- Maya: Good idea, Nick!
- Phoenix: (Apparently, E.S.P. is no aid in detecting sarcasm...)
- Maya: Nick..
- Phoenix: What!?
- Maya: The fireman yelled at me when I called him..
- Santa Larry: Long time no see, Nick
- Maya: Nick... you know Santa? Wow... Nick and St. Nick... Hey! I see the connection!
- Edgeworth: So, you've come to laugh at the fallen attorney? Then laugh, laugh! Well? Why aren't you laughing?
- Maya: Nick... Should we be laughing?
- Phoenix: Nah. It's a trick. Laugh and he'll get mad... or burst into tears.
- Maya: Oh, it's Christmas today! I forgot! What are you getting for me for Christmas, Nick?
- Phoenix: Ask Santa.
- Maya: (Looking at the noise-activated camera) Let's try it out! Hi! I'm Nick!
- Camera: (Silence)
- Maya: Maybe I'm not saying it loud enough? HEY! I'M NICK!
- Camera: (Silence)
- Maya: Huh... NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK!
- Phoenix: Will you stop that?
- Maya: Maybe it's broken?
- Phoenix: D-Don't kick it! Maybe it doesn't respond to voices!
- Maya: Oh. Let's try..
- Phoenix: The party popper..?
- BANG
- Camera: Klik klik klik klik klik klik klik klik klik klik..
- Maya: ...Yep. It works.
Other
- Manfred von Karma: Witness, you've had a long day. Shut your pie hole.
Rise From the Ashes
Ema Skye
- Maybe Edgeworth took his unholy revenge on the detectives and slapped somebody!
- You know, I got a 97 on my Science test the other day!
- So that's why everyone craves about caviar! It's so tasty it hurts!
- The prosecution will wait... I'm not finished eating.
- I spent a whole day looking for my dentures. They turned out to be in my mouth all along.
Miles Edgeworth
- Our job is to find truth, no matter how painful it may be.
Dialogue
- Edgeworth: What the hell is that wriggling piece of plywood?
- Meekins: Sir! That is the pride and joy of the entire Criminal Affairs Department, sir! It's the Blue Badger, sir!
- Ema: There you are! Where've you been? My sister's trial is tomorrow!
- Phoenix: Um... and you are?
- Ema: It doesn't matter who I am, it matters who YOU are! You're the famous defence attorney Mia Fey!
- Phoenix: ...
- Ema: ...Oh! You're not Mia Fey are you?
- Phoenix: I'm sorry. Mia Fey no longer... works here.
- Ema: So you are... the coffee boy?
- Phoenix: I'm Phoenix Wright, defence attorney.
- Ema: (writing notes) Wright... Wright... Wait! You mean THE Phoenix Wright. The Phoenix Wright from the Edgeworth murder case?
- Phoenix: Um, yeah sure. *It wasn't Edgeworth getting murdered though*
- Ema: Phew... that's a relief. You're better than nobody.
- Ema: I promised my sister I'd bring her Mia Fey but...
- Phoenix: Incidentally, Mia was a woman.
- Ema: Yeah, I thought you looked a bit strange when I first saw you.
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Justice For All
The Lost Turnabout
Phoenix Wright
- Mr. Wellington likes BIG bananas!
- (When presenting the yellow baseball glove a witness has mistaken for a bunch of bananas) Doesn't it look delicious? Care for a bite?
- (Nowhere to run... I'm sooo dead!)
- (Recalling his friends and picturing Winston Payne) ...This person... I haven't got a clue. He seems to know me but maybe he's mistaking me for someone else?
Maya Fey
- Earth to Nick! What's the matter?
- You know you're awfully forgetful these days Nick. I hope I never get to be a forgetful old prune like you.
- Come on Nick. We can talk about you being old later.
Dialogue
- Maggey: What's wrong? You've been staring at me for a while. You're kind of scaring me sir.
Phoenix: (Thinking) Hmm, I'm afraid to ask but here goes. So this might sound bad but... who are you?
- Wellington: Fashion! Cars! Women! Glasses! And of course... University! First-rates need only apply!
Phoenix: (Glasses? But you aren't wearing glasses.)
- Phoenix: Could you tell the court what is special about this glove?
Gumshoe: What's special? Never really thought about it but... it's REALLY yellow... and that's about it.
- Phoenix: Mr. Wellington loves large bananas!
- Judge: ...
- Payne: ...
- Wellington: ...
- ............
- Maya: Uh, Nick...
- Maya: I hope you've noticed the icy glares we're getting from everyone in here!
- Judge: Wh-What in the world do you mean?
- Wellington: I'll have you know I like strawberries much better than bananas.
Reunion, and Turnabout
- Phoenix: (After being asked if he wants to hear the Ini Miney's story again) (Well excuuuse me, Princess. ...Anyway, should I ask to hear the story again...?)
Dialogue
- Franziska: Cry and my whip will acommodate .
Phoenix: (What's with her? All she's said for the last few minutes is utter nonsense!)
- Franziska: I look forward to tonight's news with great joy Mr Phoenix Wright. The image of your face being projected all over the world.
Mia: All over the world? Looks like you've made a name for yourself.
Franziska: Don't be foolish you foolish fool wearing the foolishly foolish clothes.
Turnabout Big Top
Phoenix Wright
- Wonderful. Today's special must be Fillet O' Phoenix!
Maya Fey
- Nick? NICK! You're too young to die!
Dialogue
- Maya: I wish I was an animal tamer! Nick! Roll over!
- Phoenix: When this case is over, I'll roll over for you all you want.
- Phoenix: Well, what do you think of this?
- Moe:Looks tasty!
- Phoenix:Huh?
- Moe:The burgers dummy!
- Maximillion: I'm counting on you my sweeties!
- Phoenix: (He didn't just call me his sweety did he?)
- Maya: I just found it odd... Maximillion Galatica is just a country bumpkin.
- Phoenix: So? What's wrong with that? He's still a world-class magician.
- Maya: Yeah, but his name is Billy Bob Johns...
- Phoenix: (Yikes, the guy has 3 first names! That is kind of odd.)
Farewell, My Turnabout
Phoenix Wright
- Difficult-looking legal books stand in a formidable row. They mock me. I tried reading one, and it made my head hurt. When I closed it, it slipped out of my hand. Then my foot hurt too.
- (False Ending sppech) And just like that... the case came to an end. I ran from the courtroom and wandered the streets alone. I never saw Maya again. De Killer is a man of his word, so I'm sure he let Maya go. The trial of Adrian Andrews went ahead and the newspapers read the following headline... Guilty of course. The miracle never happen. Maybe it was never meant to? Because a miracle is something that doesn't exist.
Dialogue
- Edgeworth: That's not something I can answer for you... Wright... Only you can decide where to go from here. One year ago... At that time, I didn't truly understand what a "prosecutor" was. And that is why... I had to leave the Prosecutor's Office. I felt that I couldn't stand in a court of law until I knew what a prosecutor really was. And now, Wright... It's your turn.
- Phoenix: My... Turn?
- Edgeworth: What is this thing called a "lawyer"? What can you do as one? You must find the answer... And you must find it on your own.
- Phoenix: I'm a lawyer... But to fight for someone who is clearly a killer... Matt Engarde... That man is really... Argh!
- Edgeworth: It doesn't matter who, every person deserves a proper defense and a fair trial. Isn't that the basis of our judicial system?
- Phoenix: "Proper defense"? But what exactly is that? Is it where a lawyer forcibly and blindly gets an acquittal through shouting and trickery?
- Edgeworth: ...*sigh* Ironic that you of all people should say such a thing. Isn't that exactly how you have fought for your clients up until now?
- Phoenix: Uh... W-Well, that may be true, but... But that's... That's because I've believed my clients to be innocent from the bottom of my heart! But if I were to get Engarde an acquittal... That... That isn't a proper defense at all! I became a lawyer because I thought... I thought I could save people who were in suffering and in pain... But... When I look at this mess we're in... I can't even protect the person closest to me. Even if I win the case, I still lose in the end... I just don't know what to do!
- Edgeworth: ... Wright. Would you get a hold of yourself? You have it all wrong.
- Phoenix: Huh?
- Edgeworth: We aren't some sort of heroes. We're only human, you and I. You want to "save someone"? That's something easier said than done, wouldn't you say? You are a defense lawyer. You can't run away from that. You can only fight. That's all you can do.
- Phoenix: People like you and Franziska von Karma are always using all you have to pin me down. You fight to the very end, even when you know the truth is not with you. But I'm not like you. I can't fight for a false verdict -- for a man I clearly know to be guilty!
- Edgeworth: ... Franziska... She fights for herself. The only thing she fights for is her perfect win record. That's all.
- Phoenix: And!? Isn't that the same as you!? Isn't that why you ran away a year ago? Because your precious win record was destroyed!? You are so petty!
- Edgeworth: ... I see... Now I understand why you despise me so. However, you are mistaken.
- Phoenix: What do you... ?
- Edgeworth: Thanks to you, when you sealed off my path to a perfect win record... I began to realize the error of my ways. I realized that such things as a perfect win record were meaningless.
- Phoenix: I don't believe you. Are you saying that's why you left the Prosecutor's Office? But then, why? Why are you here now?
- Edgeworth: The answer to that... is something you will find out on your own. I have faith you will see it before the verdict is read tomorrow. But if you can't, then you will be powerless to change the ending of this story.
- Edgeworth: For my own personal victories...and for guilty verdicts... I used every dirty trick in the book. And so my win record remained spotless. But... A man appeared and stood fast against that selfish me. I fought him in my usual manner, and tasted my first defeat. I felt like I had lost everything because of that. And then... It was my turn to sit in the defendant's chair. And I was saved...by that person I called my "enemy"... I couldn't forgive myself for all that had happened. So I left the Prosecutor's Office. And I left that note... "Prosecutor Miles Edgeworth chooses death"...
- Franziska von Karma: Hmph, as well you should have. A prosecutor who has shamed himself with defeat should crawl into a hole and die!
- Edgeworth: ...But that was not what happened. After I left the Prosecutor's Office, I finally came to realize something. And it was in that moment of clarity that everything began to change.
- Franziska: Wh-What foolish nonsense...
- Edgeworth: We prosecutors use anything we can to attack the defendant. But every time we did so... No matter how desperate the situation, instead of giving up like most people, that man would hold strong with his undying faith. And then, before I knew it... I began to trust in that man as well.
- Franziska: Wh-What!? You trusted your enemy!?
- Edgeworth: It doesn't matter how many underhanded tricks a person uses... The truth will always find a way to make itself known. The only thing we can do is to fight with the knowledge we hold and everything we have. Erasing the paradoxes one by one... It's never easy... We claw and scratch for every inch. But we will always eventually reach that one single truth. This I promise you.
- Pearl Fey: The "truth"...
- Edgeworth: Yes. That's the reason why prosecutors and defense lawyers exist. But I'm sure you knew that already, didn't you, Wright?
- Phoenix: ...
- Edgeworth: That's why you couldn't forgive me; this man who went into hiding. Isn't that right? This man who only had his sights set on "victory", who ran away into the night...
- Pearl: Ah! Is...Is Mr. Edgeworth right, Mr. Nick...!?
- Phoenix: (You really let me down...) When you disappeared, I felt...betrayed. The reason I decided to become a lawyer to begin with...was because I believed in the things you said to me, all those years ago... And you...you betrayed your own words. That's why...one year ago, I made up my mind. I decided that the Miles Edgeworth I knew had died... At least, that's what I told myself.
- Franziska: You pathetic fool! I don't want to hear the wretched whimpering of a disgraced loser! A Von Karma is someone who is destined to be perfect! Miles Edgeworth... You are no longer worthy! You are no longer worthy of being a Von Karma! And neither am I! It's over.. It's all over!
Phoenix Wright: Ace Attorney: Trials & Tribulations
Turnabout Memories
Mia
- Well, we know whose milkshake brings all the boys to the yard...
Dialogue
- Mia: Mr Wright! Where's the bottle necklace?
Phoenix:...
Mia:Mr Wright?
Phoenix: I... I ate it. - Grossberg: When you find the evidence you need, present it and rub it into old greybeard's face!
Mia: Yes sir! Into old greybeard's face!
Judge: Mr Grossberg? Please try to set a better example for the young lady! .
The Stolen Turnabout
Godot
- To err is human... to forgive... divine. Humans aren't machines... they have souls... They live, they die, they love, they hate... and yes, they even make mistakes...
- Blacker then a moonless night, hotter and more bitter than hell itself.. That is coffee.
Luke Atmey
- Zvarri! The truth has once again been elegantly revealed to me!
- Take a good look, everyone! Unable to find a rival worthy of my genius, I was forced to create one by myself! Here I am! The tragic clown!
Ron Delite
- Come on! I'm guilty! Throw the book at meeeeeee!
Dialogue
Maya: (examining part of a sign saying "bur") Aha, I've got it! Maybe it's supposed to say "Hamburger"
Phoenix: Why would anyone write "Hamburger" that big?
Maya: Like, maybe for the "World Hamburger Festival" or something?
Phoenix: I kinda doubt it.
Maya: Aha, I've got it! Maybe it said, 'Spaghetti?'
Phoenix: ...Why are you talking about food? Oh, wait. That's normal for you.
Anyway, it says, "bur". There's no way it could be "Spaghetti".
Maya: Well, maybe it was a typo! It might have said, "Spaghetti Festival". What do you think?
Phoenix: Ok to me... Besides, Spaghetti is the only thing more tangled than your reasoning.
Maya: When did you first get that porcupine cut?
Phoenix: ...Um, it's been like this ever since I was a little kid.
Maya: What!? You mean that's the way your hair is naturally!?
I thought you had some sort of special "Phoenix Cut" deal with the barber.
I mean... You usually only see hair like that in a video game.
Phoenix: (Is my hair really that weird-looking?)
Judge: Order Order! Mr Godot! Can you explain this?
Godot:...
Judge: And stop drinking that coffee!
Recipe for Turnabout
Phoenix Wright
- After Phoenix sees Maya been 'hired' by Jean Armstrong ( I don't know whether to laugh or feel bad for Maya....Maybe I should do both...?)
- Referring to Gumshoe when he tries to deny above his love on Maggey(Note to self: Gossip with Maya about this later)
- Refering to Mia in maid's outfit with Mr.Kudo (Mia's really got this guy eating out of her hands..)
- [When Godot toss a cup of coffee at his face](Should I be grateful this coffee's only hot to give me 1st degree burns...?)
- (He's (Kudo) looking at me as if I was an evil Shogun...)
- (He's(Kudo) got to be using some sort of infinite ammo code with that box of seeds...)
- [Refering about Godot's drinking habits](Do you have the slightest idea how many cups you've had by now...?)
- ACK! NOT THE HAIR!
Godot
- You're saying that if something isn't normal, it simply isn't possible? Where does that leave the porcu-headed lawyer and the topknot chick over there... and the ungodly cool guy with the mask over here? Well, Trite?
Armstrong
- Oui! Perfect! I will 'ire you!
- Non, non, NON! You naughty man!
Judge
- You will suck down the penalty Mr Wright... and you will like it!
Dialogue
- Phoenix: Don't go licking the table cloth, OK, Maya?
- Maya: Why would I lick it? I'm not a cat, Nick!
- Phoenix:(Then why can I picture you doing just that?)
- (After Phoenix Wright tastes one of the dishes in Tres Bien)
- Phoenix: ...Urp!
- Maya: Well?
- Phoenix: Are you hungry, Maya?
- Maya: I'm starving!
- Phoenix: Here. It's yours
- Maya: Really? (Tries it out)...Urp!
- Phoenix: Remember, Maya! My wallet doesn't print money, so you'd better polish off the plate!
- Maya: I...I've just remembered I've got to clean the toilet! (goes to the another location)
- Phoenix: Hey! (You can't be in that much of a hurry to clean the toilet!)
- Maya: Nick! That's the kind of talk that could hurt a girl!
- Phoenix: Have you forgotten that Mr Armstrong is a MAN Maya?
- Phoenix: (T-That coffee! It was laced with something I'm sure of it!)
- Maya: Nick! My stomach! It hurts! ...Oh wait that's just the burger I had for breakfast.
- Judge: Mr... Um... Mr.Wright
- Phoenix: Yes, Your Honor?
- Judge: Aaahhh!!
- Phoenix: Wh-What's wrong?!
- Judge: Nothing. It's just... whenever I addressed you in the previous trial, your response was... "Youse talkin' to me?" It was a little, well... intimidating.
- Phoenix: No, no! That wasn't me! That was the phony Phoenix!
- Judge: I see. So our trusty Phoenix Wright is back with us now, is he?
- Phoenix: ("Our trusty"...)
- Judge: Mr, Wright. I would ask you to begin your cross-examination, but...
- Phoenix: Yes?
- Judge: Please, no intimidation tricks this time around. Is that understood?
- Phoenix: I already told you! That wasn't me!
- Kudo: Oops!
- Judge: Witness! You can't just "oops" you way out of this!
- (Referring about the lottery ticket)
- Maya: I want to try it, Nick!
- Phoenix: Then buy a ticket, Maya. With your own money!
- Gumshoe: They called him "the walking computer" at the place where he worked.
- Maya: What happens when he crashes though!? Does he stop moving all of a sudden?
- Phoenix: *groan* (He wasn't a computer, Maya.)
- (After presenting incorrect evidence to Lisa Basil)
- Maya: Umm, would you mind taking a look at this?
- Basil: I'm sorry. That data is SuPer-Admin Restricted Desktop Access password-protected.
- Maya: SuPer-Admin Restricted Desktop Access password-protected!? What? This is madness!
- Phoenix: No, Maya, that is SPARDA.
- Maya: Ah! It's Xin Eohp!
- Tigre: Who you callin' "Zinne Oooph"!?
- Maya: Aaaaahhh! (disappears)
- Phoenix: (Come out from under the table already, Maya!)
- Armstrong: Oui! With you here, Monsieur, everything feels right!
- Godot: Ha!
- Phoenix: Doesn't anything scare this guy!?
- (Don Tigre roars in court)
- Maya: Aaaaahhhhh! (disappears)
- Phoenix: (Don't hide under the table Maya! ...Unless there's room for me down there too!)
- Judge: I... err... I... Would you mind!?
- Tigre: What 'youse say to me!?
- Judge: N-N-N-Nothing! I didn't say nuddin'! Honest!
- Phoenix: (Who could've guessed that fear would induce a bad Brooklyn accent in the judge?)
- Tigre: I got a business to take care of, ya hear me? So who the hell called me into this hole?! Was it you', spikey?!
- Phoenix: Ack, no. Of course not... It was... the judge... (Notices the judge is gone) Y-Your Honor!!!
- Judge: (sarcasm) Oh, dear! I, um... I seem to have dropped my pen. Where on earth is it...? Don't mind me! Just carry on with the proceedings as normal!
- Phoenix: (That's it. We're doomed.)
- Judge: Ruh-roh!
- Tigre: So I dare you' to say it again! Come on! You' got the guts!?
- Judge: (Still scared) Y-Y-You can't threaten m-me, Mr. Tigre. I-It's the defense! Go ahead and tell the witness, Mr. Wright!
- (Wright disappeared)
- Judge: Mr. Wriight!
- Tigre: Sounds to me like it must be you', old man. Youse got guts, I'll give you that.
- Judge: M-M-Mr. Wright! Do not leave me to handle this alone!
- Phoenix: V-Very impressive Mr. Godot, waiting for my absence to launch your attack!
- Godot: Ha...! Found your pen at last, Trite?
- Phoenix: It was in my pocket.
- Tigre: I can see through you Phoenix Wright! That ain't the bottle with the cyanide in it.
- Phoenix: No, no. This is the bottle we found traces of the poison in.
- Tigre: Don't mess with The Tiger or you're going to get ripped to shreds! The cyanide bottle was brown. And it was made of glass. That cheap piece of trash don't look nothin' like that!
- (Phoenix just stares at thim, Godot's visor is smoking, the judge is shocked and the whole court room is completely silent)
- Phoenix: (Got him. At last...)
- Tigre: Wh-What? Why's everyone gone quiet?
- Judge: Wh-What's going on?
- Bailiff: It looks like a blackout.
- Godot: Well done...Trite. (lights back) I've saved my 17th cup of coffee just for you. (Camera shows the coffee landed onto Phoenix's head) Savor it... While you watch your caged prey.
Turnabout Beginnings
Judge
- Why, Mr. Edgeworth... I'm not sure I like you wagging your finger at me as though I were some hoser!
- Or-Order! Order in the court! What is the meaning of all this ballyhoo...!?
- "To err is human, to forgive, divine."
- Did you hear that Ms. Fey? I believe Mr. Edgeworth just called you a canucklehead.
Diego Armando
- I came to see how our little kitten was doing all alone in the big, scary lion's den. ...I thought maybe you'd like someone to play with.
- The courtroom can be a cold battlefield alright. Especially... for a beginner.
- But maybe you should keep your claws out, and show them what you've got... Kitten.
- A lawyer is someone who smiles no matter how bad it gets.
- Mia...don't cry. The only time a lawyer can cry is when it's all over.
Dialogue
- Mia: ...Err, umm... So why did you escape anyway?
- Fawles: Ah. Ah. UGGA!
- Mia: Eeeeek! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!
- Fawles: I never... I never lie! I din't escape from nowhere!
- Mia: Err... But, Mr. Fawles... The police just recaptured you two days ago.
- Fawles: ... Ugh. Sorry. I told a little lie.
- Mia: (Oh boy...)
- Judge: Yes, yes...
- Judge: It's quite obvious that the defendant is guilty.
- Mia: *OBJECTION!*
- Mia: W-Wait a minute! That's not right!
- Mia: At least hear the case before you decide on the outcome, Your Honor!
- Judge: Grrrngh...
- Edgeworth: Young people these days simply don't know how to respect their elders.
- Mia: (Why you...! You're even younger than me, you hypocrite!)
- Gumshoe: Hey, ma'am! You got any idea how much work it takes... ......
- Mia: Wh-What is it?
- Gumshoe: You... Y-You're really gorgeous...
- Mia: Excuse me?
- Gumshoe: No, seriously... My heart... It's aching for you...
- Edgeworth: Now then, if the defence is quite done embarassing itself...
- Mia: (Boy would I like wrap this scarf around his smarmy little neck!)
- Armando: Hey, Kitten... Have you ever put salt in your coffee?
- Mia: No... Why would I!?
- Armando: Why not?
- Mia: Huh...?
- Armando: It may actually go better with coffee than sugar, right?
- Mia: ...
- Armando: Listen. My point is if you're not sure, you might as well add a ton of salt to it. It might... bring out the rust in something. Like a piece of evidence.
- Mia: (He's right, Mia... Go present something. You've got nothing to lose!)
- Armando: By the way, I wouldn't put salt in my coffee. The two don't go well, after all.
- Edgeworth: All you have to do is tell us only what you saw.
- Edgeworth: Otherwise the mean lady might yell at you again.
- Mia: (Who is he talking about!?)
- Fawles: Dahlia. My girlfriend. My love. My Teen Angel.
- Mia: (Ugh. Did he actually say, "My Teen Angel"? He's seen one too many soap operas.)
- Armando: Your "Teen Angel"...? How old was she anyway?
- Fawles: Just 14...
- Mia: F-F-Fourteen!? (I guess you were robbing cradles before diamonds...)
Bridge to the Turnabout
Phoenix Wright
- Hmm... I see it now... Zvarri! A fortune-teller...?
- (Now I'm definitely up the creek without a paddle... or a life jacket)
- (To Godot) Objection! Could you please knock it off with the cheesy proverbs and illogical metaphors already!?
- Um...The rest of this court dosen't speak Coffeenese. Can you elaborate a bit more?
- Nnghn!(Did the judge take smart pills during the last recess?)
Godot
- You look like I did after I mistakenly took a swig of Worcestershire sauce.
- You think maybe my beans are under-roasted, but you have no idea gramps.
- Cute girls never lie. Ever.
- People are like books. We've all got a front and a back. You get my drift?
- I can also say that darkness loves to play with the human mind.
- There are 253 distinct types of bitterness in coffee... But to pick out each one requires total concentration and the use of all the senses.
- We can't see the demons that lurk in the night... That's why humans are weak.
- I'm only going to say this once, Lady von Whippingberg. Go home!
Dick Gumshoe
- ...You sure have one mean punch, Mr. Edgeworth! It's down-right fierce!
Miles Edgeworth
- (Gumshoe indeed! Like gum on your shoe, he's impossible to get rid of!)
- (... D-Do I really inspire this sort of frothing desire from the female masses?)
Dialogue
- Edgeworth: Are...!
- von Karma: You...!
- Judge: High! The girl... She's very high up in this picture!
- Godot: As they say.. "A cornered fox is more dangerous than a jackal".
- Phoenix: *slams desk* I believe the correct definition of a cornered fox is "scared and petrified".
- Godot: ... Your animal analogies have grown tiresome!
- Phoenix: (You were the one who started it!)
- Edgeworth: How long were you in the bath for?
- Bikini: My, my, my! What a filthy little rogue you are! I know what's on your mind!
- Edgeworth: ...?
- Bikini: Your next question is going to be "Where exactly did you wash," isn't it? Ah, THIS is why you have to watch the young ones.
- Edgeworth: W-What are you going on about? I was just... *whip* ACK!
- von Karma: Pathetic Miles Edgeworth...
- Judge: The lowest of the low.
- Edgeworth: Is there some sort of "Kick Me" sign stuck to the defense's bench!?
- Edgeworth:[referring to some flags on a line] What is this festive-looking ornament?
- Larry Butz: It reminds me of art class in grade school. We used to have a lot of fun decorating the classroom with origami. Remember?
- Edgeworth: W-Well, I...
- Larry Butz: Oh, yeah... You never were any good at it.
- Gumshoe: Really?
- Larry Butz: Yeah, this guy was so bad, he couldn't even fold a dollar, let alone a crane. Everyone tried to comfort him, but he would just sit there sobbing.
- Gumshoe: Really? I never would have expected that.
- Edgeworth: Be quiet already! I'll never forget the shame of that day! You want a crane! I can now make a perfect quarter-inch crane without a single flaw!
- Larry Butz: ... You know, Edgey... Nothing for nothing, but a quarter-inch crane without a single flaw is not easy.
- Gumshoe: Yeah, that's quite a feat, Prosecutor Edgeworth!
- Edgeworth: (Grr... This is exactly why I hate childhood friends...)
- Dahlia: I already told you... Maya Fey is dead.
- Phoenix: N-No! Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!
- Pearl: ...And what does this word say?
- Elise: That? It says "roast." That's kind of a tough word.
- Phoenix: (Just what kind of book are they reading?)
- Godot: I was the one that failed to protect Mia... ...Me and no one else. I tried to avert my eyes from the truth... to escape from the harshness of reality. I just couldn't face Mia's death head on, so I ran! I hid behind a mask. I threw away my true name. I couldn't even deal with being a defense attorney anymore, so I quit.
- Phoenix: But, but! You saved Maya!
- Godot: Yeah. That was my plan... Up until just now, anyway.
- Maya: Wh-what do you mean?
- Godot: (drinks) Are you listening, Maya? If I had really wanted to save you... ...then there's one person that I should have gone and talked to right away.
- Maya: Wh-who do you mean? Are you talking about Nick?
- Godot: But I didn't do it... I tried to get the help of Iris and your mother... I closed my eyes to the most important man involved. Do you know why? The real reason?
- Maya: No... Why?
- Godot: I suppose... I wasn't really interested in saving you at all.
- Maya: Huh?
- Godot: I think I was just trying to salvage what's left of my own broken soul... I was trying to make up for the fact that I couldn't save Mia. Nothing more. That's why I let you walk right into a situation that I knew was dangerous. Forgive me...
- Phoenix: Y-You're wrong! You put your life on the line to save Maya!
- Godot: *shakes his head* Was it really for Maya's sake...? Even I'm not really sure.
- Judge: Wh-What do you mean by that...?
- Godot: That night, in the darkness of the garden, when I saw her silhouette...a part of me must have known it... That it wasn't really Dahlia Hawthorne that was standing there in front of me.
- Maya: ...!
- Godot: It could have been Misty Fey... Or even that little girl. But still, I picked up that blade as though I were in a dream! I'm not sure exactly what was going on in my mind at that point... Was I really motivated by a pure desire to protect Maya Fey? Or was it something else...? Was it hatred for a woman who had stolen everything from me 6 years earlier...? Could it have been simply a desire for revenge? And now, I don't know anything anymore! I did learn something today, however. I finally realized that I was the arrogant one. I was just... chasing an illusion, a fantasy. The stupid fantasy of defeating you in the courtroom...
- Phoenix: ...
- Godot: You were the one who taught me that. You never ran away from Mia's death. Instead, you picked up where she left off, as a true defender of the people. In that one moment... I understood everything!
- Phoenix: Mr. Godot...
- Godot: *shakes his head* If you don't mind... I hope you'll remember... My name is... Diego Armando.
- Maya: M-Mr. Armando! I believe in you! I know you were trying to save me!
- Godot: (blood seeps out from under his visor) Hmm... Thanks.
- Phoenix: Y-Your wound...! It's bleeding!
- Godot: ...Ha! Did you forget already? In my world, the color red doesn't exist.
- Phoenix: ...!
- Godot: These must be... my tears.
- Judge: Tears...?
- Godot: Ever since I woke up from my coma... ...I think I've been waiting for this very moment.
- Maya: M-Mr. Armando...
- Godot: You'd do well to remember this, Maya. The only time a lawyer can cry is when it's all over.
- Iris: I want to... I want to apologize to you.
- Phoenix: Apologize? To me? For what?
- Iris: For the case six years ago, of course.
- Judge: I just remembered... Weren't you poisoned by your own lover?
- Phoenix: ...Not exactly, but yeah, something like that. Even now... 6 years later, I can hardly believe it. She was going to do it... She was planning to kill me...
- Iris: ......It's not all that surprising. The two of you... You hardly knew each other.
- Phoenix: Huh...? What do you mean?
- Iris: You and my sister... You only met twice.
- Phoenix: ......Huh. W-We only met t-twice?
- Iris: The first time you met was on that fateful day... The day she poisoned Mr. Armando in the cafeteria of this very courtroom. The next time you met her was... six months later. You met her again on the day that she stole your cold medicine... and Doug Swallows was killed.
- Phoenix: N-N-No way! It just... It can't be true! I mean, during our whole relationship, we were...
- Iris: ......For those six months... ...the girl that you thought was Dahlia Hawthorne... She wasn't actually my sister.
- Phoenix: (Huh? It wasn't Dahlia...?)
- Iris: I hope one day you can forgive me... Feenie.
- Phoenix: You... Y-Y-You mean...?
- Iris: That's right... I lied to you... for six months.
- Judge: B-But why...!? Why would you do such a thing?
- Iris: Ever since she gave you the bottle that day... my sister was trying to get it back as soon as she possibly could. Because of the police investigation and their surveillance... she couldn't move about freely.
- Phoenix: So that's why you...?
- Iris: My sister... From the beginning, she was prepared for the worst.
- Phoenix: P-Prepared for the worst?
- Iris: She thought that you might discover the truth. That's why she was always ready to deal with you at a moment's notice...
- Phoenix: (You mean she was ready to kill me, don't you...?)
- Iris: She already had so much to answer for, I didn't want any more sins on her soul. I begged her not to do it, and she agreed to give me a chance.
- Phoenix: And that's why... you came to me? You came to get the bottle pendant back from me in her place?
- Iris: But I couldn't get you to give it back... I failed at something even as simple as that. Six months passed and I still couldn't get it back from you. Finally, my sister couldn't wait any longer. She didn't consult me about her plans for you that day. ...It was the first time that had ever happened.
- Phoenix: That was a bit strange, wasn't it? Up until that day, you two were partners in crime, and she would confer with you...
- Iris: I think... she must have noticed.
- Phoenix: ...? Noticed what?
- Iris: My feelings for you. If I had found out that she planned to kill you... ...I would have done whatever was neccesary to stop her. Even if it meant her life... or mine.
- Phoenix: I-Iris...!
- Iris: After spending half a year by your side... My feelings for you... They changed.
- Phoenix: ...... I have something to say to you, too.
- Iris: Y-Yes?
- Phoenix: You really are the person I always thought you were. Even after Dahlia Hawthorne was found guilty... I still believed in you.
- Iris: ...... Thank you.
Ending
- Phoenix: It's only natural for living creatures to fight to protect their own lives. But what makes us human is that we fight for others. But who do you fight for? How hard must you fight...? That's the true measure of what human life is worth. We defense attorneys are warriors who are constantly challenged by that question. Even when the battle is over, and the bonds that connect us are severed... We always return... Time and time again. Mia, Maya, Pearls, Mr. Armando... and Maya's mother, too... I learned that... from all of them.
Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney
Turnabout Trump
Apollo Justice
- Isn't violence against hair a crime, Your Honor?
- Don't worry. I was up at 5AM practicing my "Chords of Steel!"
Turnabout Corners
Dialogue
- Trucy: Oh hey! An attorney badge? My Daddy has one of those too. Here, give that to me a second... Now watch as I make it disapear!
- Apollo: Ack! My badge! Bring it back!
- Trucy: Don't worry, just check your pocket.
- Apollo: ...This is... the flyer you just gave me?!
Turnabout Serenade
Apollo Justice
- ...Valant Gramarye! (...Using the door like an average muggle, no less.)
Turnabout Succesion
Apollo Justice
- "Attorney Utterly Confused", end quote.
- Or "I Still Have No Idea What You're Talking About", end quote, I might say.
- ("Judge Has Active Imagination"... end quote.)
- Believe me, any comic relief I may provide is entirely unintentional.
